two old buddies were returning home in the early morning, after a night of heavy drinking .. one of them said to the other ; – » Hold On ! what is that on the pavement over there? »  .. the other answered ; -» Looks like a piece of Dogshit !»

-» It Smells like a piece of dogshit ! » ….. -» and it Tastes like dogshit! «..

-» What Luck neither of us stepped in it it then !»..

A wife called her husband, who was driving home from a company weekend retreat..         -» Oh John…the traffic report  says there is a maniac driving on the wrong side of the road at high speed…somewhere in your area»

-» that is not the half of it Mary!» her husband replied ; -» out here they are All driving on the wrong side of the road ! »